Number #21
Ya know, I really thought October would be a month of wonderful things. Instead, it was a bit like what Jack does right after his dinner…one big hunk of steaming you know what. I mean, it was my birthday month, but nothing really special happened. I don’t know why I set myself up for that every year, but I do. Every year, I tell myself I’m just going to throw myself my own party. But, I don’t really have that many friends here to invite…and, that is as pathetic as it sounds. On top of that, Nigel continues to struggle with walking. His appointment with the surgeon was OK, but, even with the physical therapy he’s receiving, he just can’t walk well. Part of that is he needs the left hip replaced, too. And, that affects his walking. It’s one huge vicious cycle. The surgeon doesn’t want to operate until his right hip is completely healed…which makes sense. But, I’m just physically, emotionally, and mentally drained. What a way to start a blog post, right?
What I’ve been reading…
I’m still on my Truman Capote kick. I read Deliberate Cruelty which is about Capote and Ann Woodward. It often seemed to veer off into other directions, but I did discover things I hadn’t known about both Capote and Ann Woodward. It’s not exactly a sad read, but it isn’t fast paced, either. Everyone loves The Berry Pickers. I just found it so sad and unfair and yet compelling. Did I love it? Not really, but I do think it’s something everyone should read. It deals with the worth of children who are not white and what can and does happen to them. The Heiress was a strange book that I did enjoy in a weird kind of way. It’s about a couple who keep some pretty huge secrets from each other. It wasn’t a page turner for me, but I did like it.
If you’ve read The Guncle and liked it, I assure you you will like the sequel. A few years have passed, and life has changed for both the Guncle and his niece and nephew. If you’re put off by the fact the main character is gay, let me assure you, this book is about family dynamics and the love that comes from that. I really loved this book. Sandwich just confused me. I have no idea why it was named that other than the mom was constantly making sandwiches. In my opinion, it was just one long whine fest and gives menopause an even worse name than it already has. Look, I know menopause is tough, but let’s not write a whole book bellyaching about it when we’re trying to get the world to look at women as level headed as men! I was definitely not a fan of this book…not a single thing appealed to me about it. Now, onto the best book I read this month and almost every year since my daughter gave it to me to read. The Friday Night Knitting Club is a wonderful read about a single mom with a teenager who opens a knitting shop in NYC. But, it’s so much more than that. It’s the story of friendships gone south through misunderstandings, of loves gone haywire through immaturity, and of bonds forged through common loves. It’s just the best book! There’s even a sequel!
What I’ve been watching…
I usually write down what we’ve watched, but I just plain forgot. These are the movies and shows I can remember. “Agatha All Along” is, apparently, a sequel to “Wandavision” which I haven’t watched. We haven’t finished it yet, but it’s a non-scary witchy show. I actually like it and thought the main character (just from the photo) was Noel Fielding in drag! “Back to Black” is a movie about the late, great Amy Winehouse. I think it moved a little too quickly through her life and would have you believe fame came to her quite quickly. I don’t know if I found it sad because I knew she died, or if it was truly sad. “Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice” is actually a really good sequel to the 1988 movie! Michael Keaton is still amazing in this role. My only problem was Winona Ryder’s hair cut. I just wanted to tweak her bangs the whole time. It’s a fun movie if you’re into the “great beyond.” “Mother’s Instinct” was just plain disturbing. I can definitely see it as a “love letter to classic Hitchcock.” But, I also think it was a good movie with some really wonderful fashion! I have to say I won’t be sad to see the last of “The Umbrella Academy.” I think this is one of those series where it would be good to binge watch it from beginning to end. And, I mean from season 1 to the end. It’s just got so many references in it that I’ve forgotten and don’t care enough to google. I don’t even think I liked the last episode that much…I like things tied up in a nice neat little bow!
What I’ve been working on…
Nothing…I’ve been working on nothing this month. I seem to have lost my spark for knitting and crocheting. The problem lies partly in that we go to bed so early. Nigel is sleeping in the bed with the movable base, and he likes to get comfy around 9:00. I just can’t seem to get comfortable in that bed and don’t have any desire to knit or crochet. Oh, wait, I did string up some beads in an attempt to make a bracelet. I’ve just been in survival mode, I think. I did get a couple of photos of the Northern Lights.
What I’ve been buying…
I utilized my birthday discounts at Talbots and J Jill and bought a few cute things. I’m sure some of them will show up on the blog soon. My shopping mojo has deserted me…wait…I did buy some pumpkins from MacKenzie Childs when they had a bit of a sale. So, while I’d love to have my colorful velvet pumpkins and others around, this year, it’s all black and white!
Where I’m going…
I still need to get busy planning the trip to London/Liverpool with my youngest. As his birthday is in January, we’ve decided to go a bit later in the month to celebrate it. He seems to think that will be his present…he is wrong!
What I’ve been wearing…
The weather has been so moody, lately. I may start off in the morning with a sweatshirt, change to a tee, then layer the sweatshirt over the tee in the evening! But, that’s Indiana in the fall! I love it, though.
Wrap it up, Marsha!
Sorry to be such a whiner, especially after complaining about that book. It’s just been a tough year, and this month hit me hard. I feel like Nigel and I have been through so much, and it just keeps getting worse and worse. But, we have a home, a good income, and loving family. I just need to work harder on those positive neural pathways. So, can we talk? How was your month? What do you do when you’re just depleted in every sense of the word? How are your neural pathways? Please leave me a comment or two, and we can talk. I promise to respond as soon as possible.
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Where you can find me:
Linking up with Nancy’s Fashion Style, Fine-Whatever, Is This Mutton, Shelbee on the Edge, Chez Mireile, Suzy Turner, and Away from the Blue as well as Deb’s World and A Fresh Cup of Coffee. I also link up with This Blonde’s Shopping Bag, Doused in Pink, I do deClaire, Mummabstylish, Style Splash and Elegantly Dressed and Stylish as well as the Senior Salon Pit Stop (Esme’s Salon) and Slices of Life. Please check out these wonderful ladies and their blogs! I also am a co-host for Ageless Style on the third Thursday of the month and Songful Style on the last Monday of the month. I co-host Traffic Jam Weekend every Thursday with Melynda, Lisa, and Sue. I also host Final Fridays on the last Friday of the month as well as 10 on the 10th on the 10th of the month! I do hope you’ll check out all of these blogs and link parties!
Featured favorites from last month…
And, now, it’s your turn!
Please link up your favorite posts, DIY, baking, gardening, fashion…you name it…as long as it’s family friendly! Link up with me, visit a couple of others, and leave a comment or two! No worries if you don’t have a blog, just look around! You may find a new blog just waiting for you!
Marsha, I’m so sorry that it has been such a rough month for you and Nigel. I pray that he gets better quickly from this hip replacement, so he can get the next one and then feel much better!! I’m glad that you have the trip with to London to look forward too – it sounds wonderful!! Thank you so much for featuring my post about my 3 favorite Halloween tablescapes! I really appreciate it! Thanks to for hosting your great link parties! I hope the last week of this month gives you some special times! – Patty
Thank you for your kind words and prayers, Patty. Believe me, I have been praying every night. I am hoping to pull off this London trip without spending too much. There is so much to see and do, and my son can only take a few days off.
I’m so glad you link up with us. Your posts are always so much fun!
Sorry to hear you had a bad birthday month. My birthday in Nov is set to be rubbish too because there will be train and tube strikes, so we’ re not able to get to the outings I booked. Hope Nigel gets over his setback and starts to get better.
Thank you, Gail! Are the strikes for sure? That would be awful to have things booked and not be able to get there. I am hoping we turn a corner soon, and he is on the mend.
Oh Marsha, I’m so sorry that you have such a rough time. I wished I lived near you, I would take you for a walk in the fresh air and we would have lunch and you feel better over sudden! I really hope things will get better for the both of you real soon. It’s hard to push yourself out of it when things just go on and on. For what it’s worth, I love your writing and wouldn’t want to miss you on blogging life!
Thank you, Nancy! I would go on that walk with you, too. Here I am whining over something temporary, and you are dealing with a chronic situation. You are just the best person, Nancy! I appreciate your kind words about my blog. I’m not going anywhere…all those fees are paid for another year!
Oh Marsha, I know exactly how it feels to have a bad month as I still have some wobbliness and need a stick – I mean moi? I never ever EVER expected to be like that. But I think it is good to be real and talk about one’s life as it actually is, rather than pretending that everything is fine and dandy and nothing but clothes and outfits. First of all, I’m wishing you a happy birthday as I can’t remember if I said that at the time! Then I am so very sorry that you’ve had bad month. Do hope Nigel improves. Hold on in there, as I have a friend who walked around in pain and needed a walking stick for several years, but now with her two new hips and a new knee she is a completely different person and totally stickless (!) and she would be much older than Nigel. So it will get better!
I think you should take care of yourself. Next month have a Marsha month! You need to pamper yourself with fresh air, good food, family and friends. Lots of love and big hugs from across the pond XXX
P.S Btw I didn’t like Back to Black as there is a documentary on her life that is far far better than the film, which glossed over a lot. She had several toxic men in her life which was such a pity. Here’s the link to the Wikipedia description of it – there are other documentaries but this one is the best of all and critically acclaimed too
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amy_(2015_film)
Penny, you have definitely been through it, too. I think that’s been one of the tough things…seeing him struggle with this physically and mentally. Plus, I’m just not a good nurse…no patience at all. I do think, once the other hip is replaced, he will be in much better shape because his left leg definitely drags. And, that’s the leg he depends upon for strength.
Thank you for the birthday wishes. I am definitely treating myself to a facial next month, and we have Thanksgiving to plan and look forward to. Thank you for the hugs…someday, I will be over there, and we can trade real ones!
Oh, yes, I did see that documentary which was far better than the movie. I think I read the movie had her family’s stamp of approval so maybe that’s why so much was glossed over. Such a tragic life.
Oh Marsha, let me share with some things that I do. Nature! Spend some time in your garden, in your neighbourhood or anywhere with nature. Especially trees is you can. Just a walk out in nature can be a wonderful boost. Let nature work its magic! Hug a tree if you feel the need. Go buy a new houseplant that you will see everyday and that will cheer you up. Add some plants to you bedroom if you can.
Healing music! Check out some of the healing music frequencies in YouTube which you can have playing in the background.
How about a gratitude diary? I write half a page in mine every night, it helps me go to sleep with a positive frame of mind.
I don’t watch TV, all those ads and dark messages that you get from gruesome scenes in films can pull you down, plus watching lots of series on TV makes you lose precious hours of your life.
Books! Let me think of a couple that might suit, I think something with an uplifting under theme are needed: Finding Freedom: A Cook’s Story; Remaking a Life from Scratch by Erin French. Or do you like Nora Robert’s books? If so try Mind Games or Nightwork.
The presidential election coming up can’t help either, the country will be feeling anxious. Hopefully November will bring you something new.
Thank you, Rosie for all these tips. I do need to get outside more and just be one with my yard. It needs some loving care right now, too. Oh, I love the idea of a new houseplant. I do love them so. I will try some of those healing frequencies, too. Honestly, I haven’t watched the news in years. It’s so full of doom and gloom. And, yes, this election can’t be over soon enough. I really hate the mudslinging. I have been reading some heavy books so I’ve been looking for lighter reads.
Thank you, again, Rosie!
October has been a rough month for you for sure and I am glad you shared it with your readers. I value honesty and transparency because we all have similar situations. Life is tough and full of ups and downs. I hope your downs become ups soon!
I know you and Nigel have been through so much and I pray that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel and that he is able to walk.
I really appreciate your honesty about the books you read too – Sandwich sounds awful and you are right – a whole book whining about menopause? No thanks!!!
Hang in there sweet friend, I hope joy finds you soon!
xo,
Kellyann
Thank you, Kellyann! I just couldn’t write this bouncy, joyful post…I just couldn’t. So, thank you for the grace. I am really hoping he turns the corner soon. I know he’s already dreading the second surgery which will be in February or March.
I really didn’t like Sandwich and didn’t get the hype. Maybe it was the realism about menopause (though mine was never that bad) that got women talking about it. It’s a definite pass for me…I just kept hoping it would come together at some point!
Thank you, again, for your kind words.
So sorry it’s been a rough month! Praying that Nigel heals faster. How exciting that you have a trip coming up! I am jealous you got to see the Northern Lights. There is just too much light pollution in Chicago.
https://www.kathrineeldridge.com
Thank you, Kathrine. I’m hopeful we will turn a corner soon. I do need to get busy with the trip planning because plane tickets rarely go down in price! Well, I could barely see the pink with the naked eye. But, when I took the photos, I could see more of it. My friend, who lives out in the country, had some beautiful photos.
Pretty sure Sandwich is named after the town on the Cape where they vacation but I could be wrong… I mean I read the book and enjoyed it enough but that might have just been an assumption I’ve made about the title having vacationed all over the cape and in Sandwich itself a time or two. I did think they were an odd family and I know the book has come under lots of scrutiny for being pro-choice and pro-abortion but I didn’t hate it (though I was really hoping menopause doesn’t get that bad for me as I know it can for some!). I’ve been wanting to read the Guncle Abroad as I just loved the first one! I’m sorry to hear that October was such a hard month for you and I really hope Nigel continues to improve and feel better as I know how much that would help both of you feel better. We really do take on that stress and worry when one of our loved ones isn’t 100%.
Now, that didn’t even occur to me. I just checked Goodreads, and they say it’s because Rocky is sandwiched between her kids and her parents. I did wonder if that was what it meant, but her parents weren’t really in that much of the book. I think you will love The Guncle Abroad. It’s so heartwarming to see how much he loves those kids.
Thanks for your kind words, Joanne! I’m hoping we will soon turn a corner.
I’m sorry you’re in a tough season just now. I have The Berry Pickers on my list but need to be in the right frame of mind to read sad. I read The Heiress and thought it was overhyped. Just ok. Hope there are some bright spots in the week ahead!
Thank you, Joyce! I hadn’t heard of The Heiress so I didn’t know what to expect. Like you said, it was just OK. Thanks for the good wishes.
Thanks for sharing your reality with us, Marsha! I understand how you feel (although, obviously, not completely) as my husband was diagnosed with an autoimmune condition last year and sometimes it feels like it’s put our life and plans on indefinite hold as he/we deal with the repercussions of it all. At the same time, we’re both grateful that it’s something we can (mostly) manage and we do our best to find ways to find the joy in each day. It’s not always easy! I’m glad you have a trip to look forward to and it sounds like you’ve had some fun books to fill some time! Praying that November (and the coming year) are filled with light!
Thank you, Laura, for your kind words. Oh, that is a tough one. We hope there’s an end in sight for Mike’s troubles. With an autoimmune condition, I imagine you are constantly finding out new things and it’s always changing. I hope you continue to find joy in little things and each day…as you said, it’s not always easy. I’m hoping for all of us that the rest of the year is a good one.
I really need to goof off more, I didn’t know you did a monthly wrap-up post! This is extremely useful… I think we all need to do these because it’s SO hard for me to keep up; then I need to binge read. Plus my brain is a sieve and I forget things, like why Nigel is on the mend, or checking in to see how your trip went (only to discover you have a new one planned, Good for you!)
ANYWHO…happy birthday! And I’m sorry you have the blues…I’m sorta there myself so I get it. Getting bogged down with the crappy things instead of refocusing on the things that make me happy. I need to double check your Watch List as I am bi on TV watching… we’re currently hitting favorite sitcoms from the very late 1900’s…haha. We had some funny shows…and the fashions! Hope you have a better November!
Thanks, Em! Yep, I started doing them a year or so ago. Mike had his right hip replaced the middle of July, and it’s been a tough slog. It’s like one step forward and two steps back (no pun intended). I do have a second trip post in the works, but WordPress is being a bit recalcitrant. Thanks for the birthday wishes. I hope you feel better soon…it’s got to be hard when your house is all torn up for so long. I get antsy when we just do one room. Oh, yeah…the fashions from the 90s were something!
I am sorry it’s been a month! That is a lot, especially the health ones! I gave myself a 40th bday party because I knew if I wanted something with the food I wanted and the people I wanted I had to do it myself! Next year is my 50th so I know running club will do something for me and I plan to do something with my bestie in France: hopefully she can come this way! Haven’t watched much but have been reading some.
http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com
Thank you, Mireille. You were actually the person I was thinking of when I thought I’d just give myself my own party. But, when you have so few friends, it feels a little weird, you know? I think it’s wonderful you have this bestie in France. Do you ever go there on your own to visit?
Hey Marsha, thanks for sharing my Lisbon Post with the ice cream!!
I love your denim dress and Happy Bday! I know how you feel about celebrating with NO friends! I moved from my home of 35 years near Tacoma WA…on a beautiful waterfront peninsula ( where all my friends are ) to this UGLY desert las vegas 3 yrs ago! I have one or two friends here that’s it! Its hard to make friends in mid age and especially here..so many flakey people!! Im goin back as soon as I can make it work!
Xo
Valerie
http://www.mapleleopard.com
Oh, Valerie! You are exactly as I was. We lived in our home up north for over 26 years to move to a fairly ugly spot, too. Of course, I wasn’t leaving a beautiful waterfront peninsula. But, I do feel your pain. It is really difficult to make friends at this age because everyone has known everyone else for ages. And, you don’t know their backstories. It’s just tough.
Thank you so much for the compliment. I loved your Lisbon post. I hope you’ll keep linking up with not only the Traffic Jam, but my other link parties!
You’re not a whiner…you’ve been going through some tough times, and we are here for you.
It goes to show when our health isn’t ideal, that it affects everything…even our loved ones. That’s why I hate having headaches.
But you did crochet in our zoom…you should have showcased that!!
XOOX
Jodie
Thank you, Jodie! I appreciate your kind words. I had thought about adding in that I did some crocheting, but that was pretty minimal. I’m just so hopeful we turn a corner soon, and life gets back to normal.
First of all, belated Happy Birthday!
Secondly, I’m sorry that you are struggling so much. I really get how hard it is being in survival mode and having to actively look for the good in your life although your head knows it is there. I hope things will be looking up for Nigel and you soon.
I’m jealous about your London trip 😉 Although I have only been there twice in my life, I have fallen in love with it very early and can’t even explain why. Enjoy every second of it!
Cat
https://catswire.blogspot.com
Thank you so much, Cat! I appreciate your kind words. I’m hoping we turn the corner soon. I love London, too! There is so much to see and explore. I’ve been there a few times, the first time being for our 25th wedding anniversary…boggles my mind to think how long ago that was! I really need to get busy with planning it.
I am sorry that you had a bad month and wishing you a better month ahead. Thanks for hosting and I hope that you have a wonderful week.
Thank you so much, Patrick. That really means a lot to me. I’m hoping November will truly be a month in which to be thankful. I hope your week has been off to a fabulous start! And, thank you for sharing your peeks at the world!
I am so sorry you have had a struggle this month. If Nigel can just get to feeling better and moving more independently, I think the cloud will lift that seems to have settled over your heads. I am sorry his other hip is giving him fits now, too. Geez, collecting birthdays can be tough, huh?
Loved all of your looks this month. You have such a great sense of style. And although all of those looks are different, there is a similar thread that runs through them. Feminine, energetic, fun – YOU!!
The blog has never looked better, my friend. I don’t know when you had time to give it a little face lift, but it is so pretty and fresh. I should probably do something again with mine but just can’t get that into blogging anymore.
May November bring Nigel some comfort from pain and increased independence and mobility. And may you get your mojo back, my friend. Rest some when you can, give yourself some grace.
Thank you, my dear friend! I know you know exactly what I’ve been going through. It’s just so difficult right now. I’ll be so glad when the other hip is done, and we’re on the other side of this.
Thank you for the compliments. I love those adjectives! I haven’t really done anything…maybe WordPress has! I just keep doing the same things. And, yes, I’m hoping November is better than October. It can’t get worse! I will try to give myself grace and quit with the pity parties!
Some months are harder than others and I think those months are even harder when it’s your birthday month. That cake, though, looks the business. My daughter is addicted to Agatha all along so maybe I should give it a watch. Thanks for linking up & happy belated birthday.
Thanks, Joanne! I wish I’d been able to have that cake made. I’m keeping a photo of it and ordering it ahead of time next year! We haven’t finished Agatha All Along yet, but it’s definitely a strange show! I like it and find myself engrossed in the story line.
Two words…
“separate beds”
for you and your husband.
I am sorry it’s been so hard to bear…lots happening.
I know that when we moved to separate beds and rooms it improved things a lot.
I do hope you can find some lovely days ahead.
Denyse #WBOYC
Thanks, Denyse! Actually, he is sleeping in a separate bed. Luckily, we had bought a bed with an adjustable base to replace a really old mattress. He was able to elevate his leg for the first part. Now, he’s able to sleep on his side, he’s more comfortable. But, he’s taking up the whole bed! So, he will probably stay there for the foreseeable future, especially as he will have the left hip done in February or March.
Hi, Marsha – I am sorry to read that your October was not the best. Sending positive vibes your way for an excellent November!
Thanks so much! November is definitely off to a much better start than October was at any point in the month!
Oh Marsha, I wish I was there so I could give you a big hug! I’m sorry to hear that things haven’t been going well for you but appreciate you sharing with us. As you know I had lost my mojo for a time, and my advice is to just take a step back and be kind to yourself. Do things that you enjoy even if it is just reading a book or watching a movie. Sending you love and hugs and hope you feel better about things soon. Thank you for taking the time to link up with us at #WBOYC? despite everything you still have that beautiful smile! Sue xxx
Oh, Sue…you are one of the kindest people in the world. Thank you so much. Blogging has helped a lot, even though I sometimes fall behind on reading and commenting. November does seem to be off to a better start.