The Power of Words

A little history

When I graduated from college, finding a teaching position was darn near impossible. I remember attending a senior “symposium” (aka senior meeting) letting us know only about ten percent of us would actually end up being an employed teacher. Funny how they waited until that very last semester. There were several people in my class who never got teaching jobs. I graduated in December which doesn’t make it any easier to get a teaching position. But, I was able to substitute in many grades and schools that second semester of the school year.

A little more…

The following year, I filled a maternity leave for the first semester for a Resource teacher. I worked with students with learning disabilities and mild mental disabilities. This was in the early 90s when inclusion was just beginning to be introduced in the schools in which I worked. At the time, I had had only two undergraduate classes in special education. But, it was during that semester I realized I wanted to work with these students. The following year, I was lucky enough to land a job at the grade school I had attended and my children now attended. I taught the very best grade ever…fourth grade! But, at the end of the year, I was RIFed which is a teacher-y way of saying laid off!

Just a bit more…

I had already begun working on my Master’s Degree in Special Education and interviewed for a job (which I did not get) at the same grade school my dad attended. I began that next year filling a maternity leave in second grade. But, another special ed job became available in a different county; I interviewed for it; and, I got it! I split my time between two elementary schools that first year. The second year, I was fortunate and able to be the full time Resource Teacher in one of the two schools.

A wee bit more…

I worked with students from first grade to sixth grade. As a Resource teacher, I assisted students in their classrooms, my classroom, and even taught classes in their classrooms. One of my students…let’s call him George…was just a delight! Every time I think of him, the first thing that comes to mind is his huge smile! This kiddo was always happy and got along with everyone. When he was in fifth grade, I frequently taught in his homeroom. One day, I was teaching in his room. I asked a question, and he wanted to answer. I jokingly said, “Oh, you think I’m going to trust what you say!” I didn’t think a thing about it.

So, words…

It just so happened his mom worked in the cafeteria. A day or two later, she pulled me aside to tell me George had been really upset by my words. I was shocked! He believed I truly meant what I had said to him. This offhand comment I delivered with a smile and maybe even a chuckle devastated this delightful young man. I apologized to his mom and promised to speak with George as soon as I could. I saw him later in the day and explained I had only been kidding. He laughed and said it was ok, but I knew, deep down inside, I had hurt this kiddo with those few words I had lightly tossed off. I’m not sure he ever trusted me again (though we are friends on Facebook). But, that teachable moment has stuck with me for decades. I’m not going to say I’ve never hurt someone inadvertently with a spontaneous remark or two. But, I try to always be aware of how my words may be heard.

The Lewk!

I forgot to get photos of my sandals and jewelry. I wore my diamond studs and these sandals. I wore these jeans with a dress turned duster here. This J Jill tunic is light and breezy and covers my bottom! It’s a bit too long for most shorts though. Check out that gorgeous embroidery! I didn’t wear a necklace because I didn’t want to distract from the embellishment.

August 10 on the 10th!

Gail, of Is This Mutton?, came up with this month’s prompt and questions! They have to do with sports! I do hope you’ll join us, sharing your answers as well as linking up!

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Wrap it up, Marsha!

There are times I know I’m saying the wrong thing even as I’m saying it. And, then there are the times like the one I had with George. I had no idea how much my thoughtless words had hurt him. Needless to say, I watch my words, but I still make mistakes. So, can we talk? Are there times you’ve been hurt by someone’s thoughtless words? What did you do? Or, have you been the one who said something not realizing how it had hurt someone? Please leave me a comment or two, and we can talk! I promise to respond as quickly as possible.

Thank you!

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I couldn’t resist!!

Where you can find me:

Linking up with Nancy’s Fashion StyleMy Bijou LIfe, Fine-Whatever, Is This Mutton, Shelbee on the Edge, Chez MireileThe Grey Brunette, and Away from the Blue. I also link up with This Blonde’s Shopping BagDoused in PinkBeing a Wordsmith, and Mummabstylish. Please check out these wonderful ladies and their blogs! I’m a co-host on the Weekend Traffic Jam (here). I also am a co-host for Ageless Style on the third Thursday of the month and Songful Style on the last Monday of the month. I also host Final Friday Print Mixing on the last Friday of the month. I do hope you’ll check out all of these blogs and link parties!

22 Comments

  1. We always say how powerful words are, right? And you can’t just take them back…they hang out there. I can’t tell you how many times I replay what I said and wish I had said it better.
    But deep down, I truly believe we can hear the “intention” in what is being said. Not everyone has the right words (like me especially), but the smile and the tone can make a huge difference.
    I love the embroidery Marsha. That’s something right up my alley,
    XOXO
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    • Thanks, Jodie. I really thought he would have picked up on the kidding part…but I think my words hit first.

      Isn’t this embroidery gorgeous? I love how sharply it contrasts with the navy of the top!

  2. I just LOVE your outfit. It looks like it’s nice and light too. We’ve been having quite a heat wave and major drought; I feel so bad for all the farmers in our area.

    • My worry isn’t just this year’s drought…though we have gotten quite a bit of rain lately. I’m worried about this being the trend and how farmers will have to adjust to it. I’m afraid it will mean even more chemicals.

      Thanks for coming by!

  3. I love the embroidery on this top! Thanks for sharing your teaching history and for the reminder about the power of words. I would have loved to have you as one of my teachers!

    https://www.kathrineeldridge.com

    • Thanks so much, Kathrine! I think we would have had lots of fun if you’d been one of my students!

  4. This is a really pretty top. I guess I am grateful for when I graduated college because there were many teacher jobs out there. I did make my share of mistakes with things I said to students here and there, thankfully I hope not too often.
    http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com

    • Thanks, Mireille! I did not realize you were a teacher, too. I guess we all make mistakes, but this one has stuck with me all these years.

  5. A teacher can be so important in pupils life! I’ll bet you were inspiring. Great top Marsha!

  6. I defiantly love the personal touch you added to this post. And that embroidery on your top is so stunning. I love the details and colour so much. https://www.bauchlefashion.com/2022/08/first-taste-of-fall-cashmere-in-question.html

  7. Thanks for sharing this story. I can only imagine how it must have felt to realize you’d inadvertently hurt a young student, and if his mom hadn’t said something, you’d never have known. A good reminder for us all that it’s so easy to 100% know that you don’t mean to be hurtful and not think enough about how the comment will land with another person. Also a good reminder that when we (adults) are on the receiving end of a hurtful comment that we should recognize that they didn’t mean to it come across like it did – and sometimes it’s worth talking it out with the other person. I could use both of these reminders at various times!

    The embroidery on this top is so nice! It’s great when a summer item doesn’t need accessorizing due to having its own embellishment.

    • Sally, you are so wise…I rarely tell someone when they’ve hurt my feelings. I just keep letting it go. I need to be better at that! And, yes, I was really glad his mom told me so I could apologize. I truly was devastated because he was/is one of my favorite people!

      And, yes! This top is just an easy pop on kind of thing!

  8. Thanks for sharing your memory of how you unknowingly upset a young man you were teaching. It’s a reminder of how words delivered with humor can be misconstrued…..and this is challenging in the UK where we like to use a lot of irony. Thanks for linking!

    • Thanks, Gail! I do use irony and sarcasm a lot…I had to learn to be even more careful once I got grandkids! They take you so literally when they’re little!

  9. First of I adore this outfit! So cute and summery. The embroidered tunic is just marvelous. Words can hurt terribly. Like you, I try to avoid hurting people with my words at all costs (except for the few times that was my intention). But it can happen accidentally if we aren’t careful.

    Michelle
    https://mybijoulifeonline.com

    • Thanks, Michelle! I love this top quite a bit and wear it frequently (it’s one of the few things that didn’t get packed away). Oh, there have been several times when I’ve been quite intentional in my hurtful words. I can think of one incident when I was really out of line!

  10. I know that saying about sticks and stones, but words really can hurt! I can’t think of a specific instance, but I’m sure there have been some in my life that have hurt me or that I have inadvertently been the one to cause hurt. This is a good reminder to be cautious with our words!

    • I know what you mean. If George’s mom hadn’t told me I’d hurt his feelings, I would never have known. It obviously stuck with me as it happened over 25 years ago. I guess part of the lesson is to remember when I feel that way about something someone says to me.

      Thanks, Laura, for coming by!

  11. Lovely outfit!

    A teacher is everything to a student. Thanks for allowing yourself to be vulnerable to share this story.
    “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in baskets of silver” (Proverbs 25:11)

    Emma

    • Thanks, Emma! I keep that occasion in my mind always. I try to think how my words will be perceived. Sometimes, I fail, and I have to accept that and learn.