Sue, from Women Living Well after 50, has written a few posts about keeping your sparkle going. She is such a talented and informed writer. I hope you’ll check her out. The gist of her posts is we sometimes lose our sparkle because life intrudes. And, I’m here to tell you life has certainly intruded in ways I’d never thought to consider. I keep thinking about my sparkle. The funny thing is I wrote and presented a mini retreat at our church about keeping our sparkle. Apparently, I don’t listen to myself!
So, sparkle…
The other day, I was thinking about my dream car. Before I met Nigel, I wasn’t a car person at all. Well, that’s not entirely true. My dad had a couple of Mustangs, and I thought they were really cool. But, Nigel was really into cars which led me to look at cars with a new appreciation. So, over the years, I’ve had some nifty cars and some not so nifty cars. My favorite car of all time was a 1999 Saab 9-3. I loved that car. It was sporty and went fast, had heated leather seats. The ignition was located in the center right under the gear shift. But, I digress. So, I’ve been thinking about my dream car. Saab went out of business years ago. That means that’s a no-go. What other car says, “Marsha?”
The dream car…
Now I’m wondering what you all would think is my dream car! At this moment in time, my dream car would be a convertible Volkswagen Beetle. Guess what? They don’t make those anymore, either! But, I could probably find a used one much more easily than finding a used Saab. That got me to thinking about how to make the car truly mine. I would add sparkles to the back of the side mirrors, give her some eyelashes, and maybe go for a vinyl car wrap with paisley, maybe a floral, maybe a graphic print. I don’t know. Well, that got me to thinking, “Am I too old to have a car with eyelashes and glitter? Would I become known as that crazy lady with the glittery Bug?”
And, then…
That got me to thinking when do we give up the sparkly things? When are we officially too old to wear those things? Is there a manual for this? Do we, say at 85, put down the sequins and pick up the tattered cardigan? At 90, do we put down the shimmer eyeshadow and settle for the matte? Maybe, at 100, we put down the blush and settle for ghoulishly grey? Are there Fashion Police lurking behind the corner to tell me/us the line has officially been crossed?
Seriously, though…
I got my flu shot today and wore this outfit. As I was walking in, I noticed other women of a certain age, shall we say. Many were dressed quite casually in shorts and tees. Lots of them were sporting bike shorts and tees. Now, there’s nothing wrong with that, but I was the one getting the side eye! I think we’ve gotten so casual that someone who dresses up just a bit (I had taken off the jewelry) is unusual enough to warrant a stare. Now, you all know I’ve been dealing with hair issues, but so many of the women I noticed seemed to have just given up on any style at all. I think, as a society, we have written off women over the age of, let’s say 55. And, as a society, I think many women are just saying, “Screw it. Nobody notices anyway.”
On the other hand…
For those of you who don’t know, I’m a Libra so I’m always going to see that other side. Maybe these women are saying, “Screw it. I will wear what I want. I’ve earned that right.” If that’s the case, I say more power to them. I’m all for everyone wearing what they want as long as it’s socially appropriate. Notice I didn’t say age appropriate? By socially appropriate, I mean no undies purposely exposed because there are little ones out and about. And, as much as I like to use the f bomb, I wouldn’t ever wear something with the word on it. Again, think about those kiddos just learning to sound out words. There may be other things, but I can’t think of them right now. The point is some women wear bike shorts and tees because they feel good in them. And, that’s totally OK. Like I always say, “You do you, boo.”
The outfit…
Like I said, I was getting a flu shot today, and I wanted to wear something sleeveless. Most places, however, are air conditioned to Arctic levels so I also knew I wanted to have a coverup. And, I also needed an outfit for this post! I’m wearing a cute sleeveless cotton dress from Gudrun Sjödén, and it has pockets! It’s 100% cotton and a little sheer. I don’t mind people seeing my legs through my dress. I’m sure they can tell I have legs! The cover up is from April Cornell and appeared on the blog here. I’m even wearing the same sandals! Is this another outfit that looks like a nightgown and robe? Could be, but I like it.
The Lewk!
These Born sandals have been around the block and then some! I also have them in black and yellow. They’re comfortable but not really for the long haul. The two bracelets are from Premier Designs. The sparkly, longer necklaces are from Banana Republic. The shorter necklace is from Lagos. The earrings are old and from eBay.
Wrap it up, Marsha!
Well, this post is a little all over the place, isn’t it? That’s a little peek into how my mind works! did have another Saab 9-3 a few years after the first. But, it wasn’t as sharp as the black one. Nigel also bought me a Saturn Sky for Christmas one year. I’m sure I’ve mentioned that in a post somewhere. So, can we talk? What car did you think would be my dream car? Have you noticed older women dressing down much more than ever? Why do you think that is? How do you keep the sparkle in your life? Please leave me a comment or two, and we can talk. I promise I do respond. Please check back in a couple of days if you don’t receive a notification.
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10 on the 10th reminder…
This month is all about telling us about something. I hope you’ll play along and link up!
Where I link up:
Linking up with Nancy’s Fashion Style, Fine-Whatever, Is This Mutton, Shelbee on the Edge, Chez Mireile, The Grey Brunette, and Away from the Blue as well as Deb’s World. I also link up with This Blonde’s Shopping Bag, Doused in Pink, I do deClaire, Mummabstylish, and Style Splash. Please check out these wonderful ladies and their blogs! I also am a co-host for Ageless Style on the third Thursday of the month and Songful Style on the last Monday of the month. I co-host Traffic Jam Weekend with Emma every Thursday. I also host Final Fridays on the last Friday of the month as well as 10 on the 10th on the 10th of the month! I do hope you’ll check out all of these blogs and link parties!
The funny thing is; it’s not just older women! High school and even middle school kids (of both genders!) show up to school in flannel pj pants and fuzzy slippers, hair in messy bun or completely uncombed, I sometimes think perhaps casual has become a bit too casual but as long as all major body parts are covered I don’t really care much what others wear either. And I never think you’re too old for sparkles.
Oh, I hadn’t even thought of school kids. When my oldest granddaughter was in middle school, each year would be a different store that was in fashion. I wonder if that isn’t a bit of teenage rebellion. My granddaughter was so upset about the dress code because she wasn’t allowed to show her shoulders. It made me chuckle a bit how angry she was, yet she had a good point. Boys shouldn’t be distracted by shoulders, and I wonder if they even were. I think this was an over-reaction to girls wearing spaghetti straps.
Thanks, Joanne!
My dream car has always been a corvette – any color will do! I could see you in a fun car with a paisley or floral vinyl wrap and definitely eye lashes and glitter!
I really enjoyed your content today – I agree, we should wear what we want but I get tired of hearing women say – “why dress up, who’s gonna see me anyway?” I say dress for yourself! I also think when women are giving you the side eye they are thinking to themselves that they wish they could dress like you. We become invisible because we allow it to an extent. I say wear glitter and sequins forever if you want, I will always be that woman who shows up dressed. My mom does too – at almost 80 she is dressed with make up on and hair done every day! We do this for ourselves because that matters most! It’s like preaching to the choir, right? Those of us writing blogs and sharing fashion probably all feel the same way, like minds I guess! You are a ray of sunshine (and sparkle) Marsha!
xo,
Kellyann
Oh, I would love a Corvette, too…actually a couple of them. I’d love a ’63 split window coupe as well as a brand new one…preferably a bright yellow one! I want people to see me coming! You would look fabulous in a Vette, Kellyann! What color?
Those early days of Covid…I didn’t get dressed at all. I just didn’t see the need. It was bad. But, then I decided to start getting dressed and wear make up, and my attitude definitely improved. I don’t ever want to feel that way again.
As for invisibility, it makes me sad when women of a “certain age” seem to just give up. No, we need to demand space for ourselves, and if the sequins and glitter help me take up that space, I’m going to do it! I’m glad to hear your mom does that. My mom always did her hair and drew on her eyebrows. But, she never really wore much makeup to begin with.
Thanks so much, Kellyann! You are a wonderful ray of sunshine, too!
This is such an interesting post for so many reasons. Love your outfit but here in the UK women would wear the sleeveless dress without any cover up, unless of course you’re worried about sun damage which I am, But the long cover-ups are not a thing here. Is this because we don’t have air con? I mean, everywhere (like shops, your home, and so on) is hot and all we want to do is be cooooool! So it’s bare arms and dresses when you go out, anything to keep cool. Actually I don’t understand why air con is so cold??? Can it not be just a few degrees cooler – it’s so interesting.
Yes, this casual way of dressing. I think it is more predominant in the States (from what I see in the media) but it’s here all the same. And there does seem to be a uniform look for many older people here as well, which is jeans or loose black pants and a t-shirt, Here in the older age housing complex I live in, I don’t see many dresses. It must be so hot wearing pants/trousers and a tee. Personally I shall wear sparkles and tulle for ever. And actually I have decided to really go for the biker/rocker chic look in the colder months. That’s my aim, anyway!!!
You totally rock that outfit – I bet people look at you and wish they had dressed like that! You are such a stylish icon!! have a great rest of the week 🙂
Thanks, Penny! A stylish icon…I love that! I think the US is definitely a more casual place. I have been surprised to see people (usually young girls) at the upscale mall in PJ pants and slippers. They look cute, but it still surprises me.
As for air conditioning, I think it’s so cold because the retailers, offices, or restaurants are trying to cool large areas. That way, there are spots that are colder as well as spots that are warmer. As it turned out, I probably wouldn’t have needed the coverup as it was quite warm in the pharmacy.
You will totally rock the biker/rocker chic look. It is definitely your aesthetic!
Thanks again, Penny!
I could absolutely see cute you in a VW Bug…and the paisley wrap is an inspired choice. I think we all should sparkle as long as we want and as long as we can! There are plenty of days I’m a shorts and T person…especially if I’m not going anywhere. But I’m so much more comfortable at this age on the occasions that I leave the house “as is” than I ever would have been years ago. No apologies.
I rarely go to any medical office w/o putting in the clothing effort…I tend to think the professionals are more respectful in their attention and explanations. And I do like dressing up and should more, even if no one else does.
Wouldn’t have guessed you have a salty tongue, haha. The f-bomb was one I always tried to avoid, but it has peppered my speech since covid began. I never think a thing of it when I use it, but I am still almost always stunned when I hear someone else say it…which tells me something about myself that I might want to listen to, haha.
Nah, Ef that!
Wellllll…I’m also a bike shorts and tee kinda person for the most part at home! I’m sure my neighbors get tired of seeing me in the same old clothes. But, when I’m out and about, I usually dress a bit better. I have been known to go incognito to Home Depot or Lowes in my bike shorts and old tee when it’s painting or planting time!
Oh, a salty tongue is a nice way to say it. I think it definitely got saltier during Covid. I don’t like to hear it in public, though. I usually keep it in the house or the car!
Thanks, Em, for coming by!
A Volkswagen beetle was actually my dream car. My husband was tempted to get me one once but he didn’t… I would have loved it before kids. Anyhow, I think you would be awesome in the one you described! I love getting dressed in the morning and often am surprised when people don’t do more than a large tshirt and leggings/bike shorts. But they can do them, and I do me!
http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com
I should have put this in my post. We actually bought an older Beetle from a guy my BIL knew. It barely had any heat and smelled so bad. Mike traded it in on a used pickup. We got a call from the dealership that it was a stolen car! They wanted us to pay them back, but we had a title. I don’t know when it was stolen because it was really old when we bought it.
I agree with you, Mireille! They can do themselves while we do us!
Thanks for coming by!
Never give up the sparkle, bling or anything fun. People are totally casual around here too, but I believe in overdressing. It’s me and I own it!!
Love the dress Marsha. And I’m still driving my dream car. It’s a 1997 Honda Del Sol. My first ever new car and it’s still going strong.
OXXO
Jodie
http://www.jtouchofstyle.com
Thanks, Jodie! I doubt I ever will! I have too many clothes to wear! I do usually leave off accessories as it’s just so hot.
Wow! When I was teaching, I got a new car about every 2-3 years. We were dumb a couple of times and leased a car. Other times, they were brand new models and had all kinds of computer problems. My first Saab…it spent six weeks out of the first eight weeks I owned it in the shop. My current car is five years old. I would love to get a different car because it’s not easy getting out of the passenger side though I have no problems getting out of the driver’s side.
Marsha, I love this dress and this post and I can totally picture you cruising around in a Volkswagen Beetle with paisleys and eyelashes! I have never ever considered my age in how I dress or present myself. I am just me through and through, all day long, without any shame. Let the people give me the stinky side eye. I rarely notice anyway! I have style goals to be as extraordinarily eccentric as the wonderful Ms. Iris Apfel! Rock on, my beautiful friend. You look fabulous!
Shelbee
Thanks, Shelbee! You know, I was going to mention Iris Apfel, but I totally forgot. I want to be eccentric and wonderfully attired like her, but I don’t necessarily have her chutzpah (not to mention her money)! You will always be you and come up with ingenious and definitely Shelbee looks!
I’m also quite fond of the beetle convertible and I really like the modern version of it as well. Almost got one several years ago but two small spots of skin cancer squashed the notion that I would drive around town with the top down so what was the point. Such is life. And don’t get me started on the very weird choices people make when deciding on what to wear out in public. All in the name of comfort which IMHO is a bunch of huey.
Rena
http://www.finewhateverblog.com
It’s funny you should mention the skin cancer. Mike has had numerous precancerous spots frozen off as well as having to use special shampoos and creams. So, now, he wears a hat all the time. We actually had a convertible (a Saturn Sky), but rarely drove it with the top down because it would be so hot. Of course, I now regret trading it in for, of all things, a Honda Civic!!
You know, I don’t like to judge what others wear but goodness! I have to think these women had been more places than just to the drug store to pick up a prescription. But, others may say the same about what I wear!
Thanks, Rena!!
Your dream car ideas are so fun! My aunt drove Corvettes for years (including a pink one). My mom had a red Mustang convertible for a good long while. My parents had a VW bug that they bought in Germany and had brought over to the US before I was born, and that’s the first car I ever knew.
I like the polka dot dress! I actually do specifically dress down in athleisure to go to the doctor’s office for shots, etc., so I could have been one of the women in bike shorts. I don’t do that for other outings, though. Strange!
Thanks, Sally! It seems you’ve been surrounded by cool cars for most of your life! My DIL’s dad has a Corvette, but I haven’t ever ridden in it (they live in Florida). My dad had two Mustangs, but they weren’t convertibles.
I bet you aren’t as dressed down as the ladies at the pharmacy!
A 1957 turquoise Thunderbird convertible has always been my dream car. Maybe one day…
Since I work remotely, I like to dress up whenever I leave the house but I think that society as a whole has realxed their dress code over the years. Especially since the pandemic. Anyway, I love this layered look! Your duster is so pretty!
Jill – Doused in Pink
Oh, Jill! If you get one, can I take a ride with you? I would also suggest wide whitewall tires!
I think the pandemic definitely changed the way we dressed, but I read that as we are slowly (if ever) coming out of it, that fashion is changing and reflecting the need to dress up again. So, maybe there’s hope! I know, during the height of lockdown, I didn’t get dressed and was so down. Once I decided to dress and do makeup, my attitude definitely changed.
Thanks, Jill!
I would not have guessed you as a VW Bug kinda-gal. Saab, yes. But VWs are so fun and you are adorable so find that perfect bug, add some Marsha magic to it and make it yours. I was really torn about what to buy when Mom passed and left me money for a new car. Part of me wanted to get something fun and sporty and definitely fast. The other part of me remembered that I need room for car seats, and groceries and suitcases. And that part of me won out. I did get a sunroof and love having it open. That’s fun, right?
I look at myself in recent pictures and feel like my sparkle has dulled. LIFE. I blame LIFE. We have battled some difficult things this year, you and I. Our sparkle is still there but has been worn down a little. Maybe in the coming months, LIFE will be gentler and we can get back our shine. I think the world of you, my friend. Your writing always sparks something in me. And your looks are always feminine and pretty. And that’s why you are getting the side eye. Because you are feminine and pretty and radiant.
Oh, Leslie! Yes, my friend, we have been through it this year and for a even longer. But, we will come out of it stronger, right? Didn’t Nietzsche say that which doesn’t kill us makes us stronger? So, I’m going to work hard at being more me than I have been for the last few years.
But, thank you, my dear friend, for your compliments! Yeah, I’m not 100% sure I’m a Bug girl, either, now that I think about it. But, it was a Bug that got me going down that sparkly road!
You are soooo good for my ego!!
I guess I would’ve thought your dream car would be something huge because Americans tend to drive huge cars over there LOL!!!! I love the idea of you driving an old Beetle with eyelashes though and a bit of sparkle! Why not? I think you’d look fab in it. I love the fact you wore something bright and colourful for your flu shot. It’s such a shame that some women give each other the look, isn’t it? Personally, I wouldn’t…I love seeing women make an effort! You look fabulous, Marsha!
Hugs
Suzy xx
Hahaha! Suzy, I don’t like big cars and really don’t even like driving Mike’s SUV. I like the little compact cars best! I had a van for exactly one year and go rid of it as soon as possible! I would love to have a Beetle with eyelashes, but that probably won’t happen. I wonder if I could find them for my Civic!!! I don’t want to sound snobby (though I guess I do), but I like it when I see women and men putting effort into what they’re wearing. Now, don’t look at Mike on any given day because he’s probably in his grubby tees that I hang to the back of his closet!
Thanks, Suzy!
This post definitely resonates! As you know, I like to wear bright colors. On a recent organised walk in London I wore bright shorts, moto jacket, jewelry. I was getting a lot of side eye! The other women, my age and older, were all in drab clothes, and they seemed to avoid me as if they assumed I was a show off or something. It felt quite upsetting! As you say, maybe they think dressing in clothes which are comfy and don’t attract attention is what they’ve chosen. But I firmly believe color and glitter brighten our lives. I absolutely love your outfit Marsha, the colors really suit you!
Thank you so much, Gail. I wonder if it’s not the societal pressure of blending in that women of our age might feel. They don’t believe they should dress in bright colors and glitter so they don’t. They choose things that help them become a part of the landscape rather than being the bright fuchsia plant in the middle of it! I will always choose to be the bright plant!
Thanks again, Gail!